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Caregiving Tips for the Holidays

With the holiday season just around the corner, now is the time to prepare ourselves for what lies ahead. The holiday season can be a tough time for caregivers. The holidays often bring stress, frustration and anger, and sadness—rather than holiday cheer, peace, and good will. Caregivers may feel loss of "the way things used to be" or resentment for the lack of help from other family members. Or caregiving responsibilities may prevent you from participating fully in parties and celebrations.

Without any reserves, caregivers may feel overwhelmed at the idea of adding more to an already full plate of responsibilities. Preparation for the holidays—shopping, cooking, and juggling competing priorities—may feel like a drain on precious energy. Following are some suggestions for avoiding the stresses and blues associated with the holidays.

COMMUNICATE: Honest communication with family and friends about the realities of caregiving responsibilities may open doors to needed help. It may also help to alleviate feelings of isolation. Also, consider including a non-threatening update on your loved one's condition with holiday cards, as this may bring about new offers of assistance from relatives and friends.

BE REALISTIC: Set realistic expectations about what you can accomplish and be clear about your energy level. Let your family members know how busy your caregiving duties keep you and that you don't necessarily have additional energy to host gatherings. Also, don't expect everything to be perfect. Planning ahead can be very helpful when balancing the demands of caregiving and the extra activities of the holidays.

BE FLEXIBLE: Rather than experience the holidays the way you do every year, you'll likely need to adapt to your situation. This may mean allowing other family members to host more time-intensive festivities and/or choosing which events to attend based on what is simplest, least exhausting, and most enjoyable for you and the person for whom you provide care. Don't expect a person with cognitive impairment to be adaptable to all situations. Instead, be flexible and do what makes sense.

In short, when attempting to juggle the demands of the holiday season and your caregiving duties, remember to listen to your needs, set realistic expectations, plan ahead, and be flexible. The holiday season is not just a time to celebrate and share time with family—it is also a time of emotional and spiritual renewal. Use this time to relax, rejoice, and reconnect.

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